I so scared of lossing my parenter. I found out thursday that i have gential warts. I cry the whole time at the office and allthe way to his house to give him the letter. The doctors told me that they can get ride of the warts. And to make sure i use a commdon for now on. But what I am so up set is that he didn't believe me whent he doctor said that I could have got the first time I had sex. Or then again whould the be a change i could caugt it from my brothe that mullested me as a child. i was six and eight when this happen. web say that you can break out 3 month to years or some people may never break out. Is this true. I know I have been faith ful to him. And i tring to go and get him tested. But i scared that he don't have it he leaven me. I mean i been cry alot because he my rock. We don't live together. so i only get to talk to him on the phone and when i can go to his place and when he not busy he comes over. WAS I right telling him the truth? I was told to day it might have been better to keep my mouth shut and told him nothing. but that would not be honestiy. This is all news to me and i already crazy enough but this is the tip of the icebruger. Not only is he my boyfriend but my best friend, teacher, someone i look up to. He the first guy to respected me for who I am. I don't know what to do. marty

Hi there Marty,

Thanks for joining our community.

It can be really difficult to know which partner might have had HPV first, or how long ago they were exposed to the virus. It often does take a few weeks or months for signs of HPV to be detected, but it can reasonably take many years. HPV in and of itself doesn't mean that anyone has been outside the relationship recently, but the "when" and "from whom" questions are often never really answered.

When someone is first diagnosed with HPV, it can be very difficult on a person's self-image. These emotions of guilt and shame often stem from the fact that we grow up with a lot of misconceptions about STDs, such as who gets them and why. In reality, an HPV diagnosis does not reveal anything about a person's values, their personality, or choices, only that they like many others, have contracted a common virus. You are taking an important step by educating yourself about HPV.

You've been through a great deal, especially with what you mentioned happened when you were a child. If you need help sorting through any of this, you might want to contact the Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network (RAINN), which is available at 1-800-656-4673 or www.rainn.org. RAINN, a non-profit organization based in Washington, D.C., operates America's only national hotline for survivors of sexual assault. The hotline 1-800-656-HOPE offers free, confidential counseling and support 24 hours a day, from anywhere in the country. We wish you well.

There are experts who don't think it is likely couples sharing the same HPV type(s) will "ping-pong" the virus back and forth to reinfect each, and we're not aware of any data that indicate this is likely to be an issue. Some studies suggest that using condoms might help both the virus and associated skin lesions clear a bit more quickly, and sometimes couples feel more comfortable having protected sex.

While there is no medical cure for viral infections (like HPV), and HPV might exist in very small numbers in deep skin cells long after lesions (like warts) are gone, the immune system seems able in most cases to suppress the virus. While this should be regarded as opinion, some experts do believe that removing genital warts may lower the risk of transmission since it reduces the areas of tissue that contain most of the virus. Removing warts cannot guarantee that the risk of transmission is removed. However, if no symptoms recur in the subsequent months following treatment, the chance of transmission dramatically decreases, and some researchers consider the possibility of being contagious during this time would be minimal to remote.

Marty, it took a lot of courage and openess for you to post in our forums, and I'm very, very glad you did. You mentioned how your partner is many things to you, friend and teacher, and that can be a good thing. Never lose sight of the fact that there is strength and value in you, just as you are, and you are valuable and have a lot to offer in your own right. Please visit this online forum often.

Hope this helps. All the best,
Fredo

_________________
ASHA Moderator

Fredo,
Thank you so much. I will check out the web sit you gave me. I didn't know who to talk to and I know that noone here knows me and i feel safe from being discrimed against. Soemone told me other day that maybe i should not of told my parenter. but I don't believe in lieing. and someone ask am I sure that i didn't get it from him. I don't really want to know this and cann't blame him. For everyone makes mistake and the way i see it if God wants us together then he will have us to gether. Again i want to say thank you.
marty

Glad to do it, Marty. Good luck and stop by whenever you have questions, or just something to share.

Fredo

_________________
ASHA Moderator

i was reading an artical, on hpv. http://www.hpvfaq.com/hpv101.asp my son over the summer had planter warts so does this mean that he has this hpv?
marty

Hello again Marty,

There are over 100 types of HPV, the vast majority of which are not linked with either sexual contact or anogenital skin. Common warts of the hands and feet, for example, can be caused by HPV types other than those that might lead to genital warts or cervical cell changes that a Pap test detects. These HPV types are not commonly found in anogenital skin, and the reverse is also true: the HPV types that are linked with sexual contact don't often become established and create diseases on other skin areas.

Hope this helps.

Best,
Fredo

_________________
ASHA Moderator

Marty, you are strong. I am in a situation where I just found out that I have HPV and am battling how to tell my boy friend. He is the love of my life and I am so scared. And like you I don't believe in lying either. The worst part is i don't know who i got it from considering i've been with him for 3 years and as far as I know he has been faithful to me. I don't even know how I would start the topic. He always asks me if I have any STD's or STI's and I would tell him "not as far as I know" as I used to have my pap test done yearly. Now things are going to change so badly and I don't know how I am going to cope with it.

Rosie,

Hi there, I know its hard. And after month 1/2 my boyfriend did break up with me he said it was because i what i have but he is still there for me. Its hurts still because I love him very much and the people I date since then I been up front with and they have respected me. And it is hard. I want you to know that I will be there for you to talk to If you need someone to talk to you can email me at marty0764@comcast.net or im on yahoo under marty0764 Just tell me that we meet on hear. I will be there to support you. I want you to know that I learned the hard way that my ex boyfriend only love me as a friend I hope yours will understand and be there for you. It will get easier and there alot more I would like to tell you what I learn so when you have a chance give me a yell.