Dear Fredo and the ASHA Staff,

You give me hope and a peace of mind in my time of crisis. I have been devastated my this. When I look at my son, I get so depressed and break down and cry because I have thought of this like a death sentence.

What makes me so nervous is that I have not gotten the second HPV/pap smear because of the BV. I am taking what the doctor prescribed to me, but I still have a discharge. It is no longer liquid like but cottage cheese like and yellow, so I have been panicked because I want to know what strain I have.

Emotionally this diseased has made me feel diseased. I find myself distancing myself from my son. I feel ashamed and disgusting. My relationship has change towards myself. I am scared to touch any parts of my body like putting lotion on or bathing. I am back to wearing gloves

All I wanted was to be married and raised my child, and I ended up like this. I have decided to be alone forever. I do not want to destroyed another one's life like mine as been. All I pray for is to grow old to be around for my son.

I wished my husband would have never had sex with that woman who was infected with HPV, and I wish that I had not been stupid enough to try and make a marriage work with someone who hated me enough to risk my life.

Thank all of you because I am alone dealing with this.

Shegi

You keep checking in as often as you like, and I'm glad you posted in our Chill Lounge forum, too!

I'm sorry this is so hard for you. Time will help, as it does with most things, and there is absolutely no need for you to be alone forever simply because of HPV. Virtually all of us will have one (or more) HPV infections, and - especially for men - there are seldom negative health outcomes. Just move at your own pace, though. You've done nothing wrong!

Best always,
Fredo

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ASHA Moderator