Thanks for posting and I'm really glad you found us. I notice that you don't have a medical diagnosis yet, so curious as to why you think you have HPV. Are you having symptoms, or has a former partner said something about a diagnosis?
Feeling ashamed, guilty, scared, and all that is not uncommon with HPV, sad to say. I think that has a lot to do with the way we're brought up to think about sex and STDs. Those feeling are understandable.
You haven't done anything wrong, though, my friend. HPV is so common that at least 75% of all sexually active people are thought to have one or more HPV infections at some point in their lives. Having HPV is, well, very normal! It doesn't feel that way, though, does it?
She is convinced that now we can't ever have children.
Nope. HPV almost never poses any problems with childbearing. Should be a non-issue.
Can we get past this? Most everyone does. Does this virus ever leave the body? Most cases clear naturally in 6-24 months. Can we ever successfully have a child without passing this virus on? Yes.
I can't see any light at the end of this tunnel. At first I thought from my research that it could be beaten but I feel completely dead right now.
You're still early, and panicked...and confused. Keep asking questions, getting good information, and hang in there! Post here anytime.
Best to you,