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National Cervical Cancer Coalition


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 Post subject: Scandalous story
PostPosted: Sat May 30, 2009 6:28 pm 

Joined: Sat May 30, 2009 4:38 pm
Posts: 8
I posted a question about clearing the virus, but this is my real issue. I need to tell a boy. I really like him and we already had sex. We were both very drunk and he pressured me into it. I don't regret the sex. I only regret that I have HPV and I didn't tell him.

I really like this boy! I'm scared to death to tell him. I'm scared he'll freak and run.

Any words of support for telling him or how to recover when he bolts would be SO MUCH appreciated. So sad.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat May 30, 2009 9:33 pm 

Joined: Mon Jun 23, 2008 9:13 pm
Posts: 89
Hi JK,

With high risk, I don't think you should be scared to tell him. There's no visible affects he would suffer. Imagine if you were in my position where my ex had warts, which probably means I have low risk too, even though I never had warts, just an abnormal pap. I have to tell a guy there's a possibility bumps may show up on his penis if he has sex with me.

I think you should find out how serious he is about you first. See if he's even worth all the anxiety. If he doesn't want a serious relationship why bother telling him. He'll mostly likely never be seriously affected by it. Just my opinion.

I wish I were in your shoes. I haven't dated in over a year b/c of this. I'm afraid to give someone else warts.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun May 31, 2009 7:32 pm 

Joined: Sat May 30, 2009 4:38 pm
Posts: 8
want2bdifferent,

Thanks for your reply. It is nice to hear that someone thinks I don't need to tell him or that the risks to him are minimal. That said, if it's ok to find a little sad humor here, it's funny that you think high-risk is better because I feel the opposite. I could have given him cancer! His risks still may be small, but I feel overwhelmingly guilty. At least if someone gets bumps on their penis, it won't kill them.

All in all, HPV sucks! So unfair!


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Jun 01, 2009 6:59 am 

Joined: Sat May 30, 2009 4:38 pm
Posts: 8
I'm going crazy trying to decide whether to tell this guy. The other scandalous part of this story is that he's married. Not to me. I don't believe he's been unfaithful before. And he says he loves me.

I want to tell him, but I'm not sure if this is more to relieve my own guilt. I wish there was a way to spare him all the fear I feel now. But he should have the opportunity to make decisions for himself and give his wife good advice.

I'm going crazy!


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