You know, it does suck, you're right. Life isn't fair at all, and no one ever promised it would be. Being one of the unlucky few that develops GWs from the premo incognito STI HPV makes you say WTF, why me? I have friends that sleep around like crazy, they don't have anything (that they know of and we all know that's the key here), I'm careful, very few partners and BAM, hit below the belt (literally). Cant' this be just some really intense dream I'll wake up from, please? It makes you feel like you might as well be castrated, or forget about having a family, no one ever would want me right? And of course all the could have/should have scenarios that run thru your head about when you didn't know you had HPV, how you would have played the cards different, made different choices, not just about relationships, but about everything. I know, it blows, big time!
But somewhere along the line I realized that I WILL beat this. It takes MANY trips to the doc for removal, eating boring vegetables (yikes), exercising (double yikes!), seeing a psychologist (lets keep that on the DL eh?) but most importantly just realizing that there is still a lot out there for me in this world. Life isn't over although it does seem that way, especially at first and you have to mourn for a while, life as you knew it is over, but LIFE is far from over. Dig deep inside, make the choice, make the choice that you will stand up and do all you can to fight HPV. I will still have HPV in 365 days, so I can either let it drag me down, or I can think of ways to fight back, find allies, doctors and psychologists, do everything in my power to not get dragged down and realize itÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s going to be a long haul.
Fredrick Douglas said, "If there is no struggle there is no progress", and don't underestimate Hope, have it, and don't give in, you never know how tomorrow will turn out, life can change very quickly (as we know), and it does change for the good sometimes too, believe it.
Oh, and it won't be alright, but it can be damn close.