What - you aren't as stupid as they'd like to think you are? shame on you! Seriously I'm soooooooo glad you found this site!! I think we can help you with quite a bit of this
Are all your symptoms typical? Yes and no. They are known to occur in a small percentage of folks who have genital herpes but they don't occur frequently. Yes indeed when you are infected with genital herpes - sometimes it can effect the nerves that control the bladder and the bowels. It sounds like the bladder issue is slowly clearing itself up. Be sure to drink tons of fluids so that you are having to urinate regularly. don't hesitate to return for catherization if you feel that you aren't able to empty your bladder fully no matter how hard you are trying. The same thing that has happened to your bladder is also happening to your bowels. Activa just gives you the "good" bacteria to help you have more normal stools. At this point I recommend either an enema or a stimulant suppository ( yeah good times ). You probably have quite a bit of stool backed up in there which is also putting even more pressure on the nerves in that area which can in turn just make a bad thing worse
You need to get that stool out of there with a stimulant - the nerves aren' t working normally on their own right now. Don't hesitate if once you've done either the enema or the suppository to repeat it again the next day if you still feel like you have a lot of pressure in that area. 2 weeks is a lot of stool to back up. You should consider taking a stool softener for a week or two to keep things nice and soft until the nerves are back to normal.
Take ibuprofen for the leg pains. if they continue for more than another week or two - follow up with your doctor or ask for a neurology consult just to make sure that you didn't have any pre-existing back/nerve injuries that weren't an issue until the herpes got in there and stirred it all up.
Same with the kidney pain - if that continues for more than a couple of more days - return to the doctor. You might have a uti on top of this all from the catheter.
As for getting your partner tested - if you are in the US - try www.healthcheckusa.com
and see if either of them have a participating lab near you. You want to order the herpes select igg for hsv1 and hsv2. some planned parenthoods offer type specific blood testing - just call and ask. Also if you can get the name of the lab your doctor uses ( ie quest, labcorp etc ) I might be able to give you the exact test number they want to order. It's unfortunate that many practioners are not up to date on herpes in general
Be sure to watch the patient counseling video and read the herpes handbook at www.westoverheights.com
. That and the info here on asha are very accurate and some of the best info you'll find on the web
feel free to ask any other questions you might have. I won't be online much for the next 2 days or so but I do check in pretty regularly normally