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National Cervical Cancer Coalition


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 Post subject: Questions!!!
PostPosted: Tue Feb 23, 2010 5:42 pm 

Joined: Tue Feb 16, 2010 11:30 am
Posts: 5
Location: Iowa
I recently tested positive for HSV2 and feel terrible emotionally. I have been with my husband for little over 9 yrs now. I told my husband and asked him to get tested and he did. My doc. said since we have been having unprotected sex for 9 yrs now it was a high chance that he have HSV 2 also. So he was tested and it came back negative. I never had any symptoms till about 7 months ago. how can this lay dormant for that long?????? Not that I was hoping that my husbands test came back positive, but it would have made dealing with this easier on my behalf! Now all i can think about is how our sex life is going to have to change and what this will do to our marriage over time.


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 Post subject: Re: Questions!!!
PostPosted: Wed Feb 24, 2010 5:20 pm 

Joined: Mon Feb 05, 2007 11:47 am
Posts: 5443
Location: PA
Welcome to the board :)

How were you diagnosed as having hsv2?

How will your sex life change? Well not at all actually. think about it, if you are testing + for hsv2 and hubby isn't, that means you had it since before you met him and just never knew it. You took no specific precautions and he never contracted it. Why would you change much of anything? When you two talk about this , what does he say about it?

betsy

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 Post subject: Re: Questions!!!
PostPosted: Thu Feb 25, 2010 10:10 am 

Joined: Tue Feb 16, 2010 11:30 am
Posts: 5
Location: Iowa
My husband now wants to use protection every time we have intercourse. By doing that, something is being taken away from me-I dont know how to explain it but I need that skin to skin contact to be able to relate and feel connected to him. How is it possible for him not to have contracted it over 9 yrs of unprotected sex????? could he have built up an immunity to it??? I dont know what to do, this news has drained me!


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 Post subject: Re: Questions!!!
PostPosted: Thu Feb 25, 2010 10:13 am 

Joined: Tue Feb 16, 2010 11:30 am
Posts: 5
Location: Iowa
I decided to get tested because a small sore kept coming up during my period each month-so I got tested as a precaution and it came back positive. I asked if the test gave a number and doc said no just comes back as positive or negative. Could I have gotten a false positive since my husband is negative???


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 Post subject: Re: Questions!!!
PostPosted: Thu Feb 25, 2010 6:09 pm 

Joined: Mon Feb 05, 2007 11:47 am
Posts: 5443
Location: PA
you had a blood test done or a lesion culture on your active symptoms?


how could hubby not have gotten it? it's really not as contagious as folks think it is. It really is as much about bad luck as anything. if you just didn't have sex because it was painful to do so because of your lesions even before you knew what was causing them, that alone made him 96% likely each year not to contract hsv2 from you.


you taking daily suppressive therapy would reduce hubby's risk more than condoms actually. discuss it with him as an option so that you'd still have the skin to skin contact you enjoy while still lowering his risk. Also give him time - this is new for both of you and even though common sense says you did nothing all these years and he didn't get it, we don't often listen to that part of our brains early into dealing with things :) keep talking together about this too and encourage him to read through prior posts here on the board on his own too to learn more.

betsy

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 Post subject: Re: Questions!!!
PostPosted: Thu Feb 25, 2010 6:28 pm 

Joined: Tue Feb 16, 2010 11:30 am
Posts: 5
Location: Iowa
I had a blood test just so I would know. I have never had a bad ob. It has always been 1 or 2 blisters only and all but 1 time in the same spot. I am just utterly confused! I read you were a nurse so I understand how you look at things, but have you ever heard of Resovle Herpes? also what do you know about a Western blot test? My husband is a chiropractor and believes in the body being able to heal itself so he researched some things and talked to a homeopathic dr about being able to clear the virus from your system. I know it may be a long shot, but I am desperate!!!!
With all this new information i am learning, i even worry about sleeping naked and having my legs over my husband. what are the chances that he would not catch it if we continue our normal sex life since he has not contracted it yet. i would never have sex while i had an ob. i feel guilty for feeling this way about the sex with condoms but i cannot help it and i just dont know how to process it. should i talk to a therapist maybe?
thanks for the information and it feels good to be able to just vent. i hate to know other people are feeling the same way I am and i wish i could push it out of my mind!


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 Post subject: Re: Questions!!!
PostPosted: Fri Feb 26, 2010 12:55 am 

Joined: Mon Feb 05, 2007 11:47 am
Posts: 5443
Location: PA
don't waste your money on resolve.

you can't clear the virus from your body either with homeopathic remedies. Wouldn't waste your time or money on those either especially since you want to protect your husband.

Do you recall your blood test results?

no worries about sleeping with hubby with your legs thrown over him either.

betsy

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