i need some advice!

before the incident that gave me hsv2, i met a great guy but nothing came of it at first. well, recently he contacted me and we've been on a few dates. i really like him and know i need to tell him about my hsv but i'm terrified he'll think differently of me and worse reject me!

i know it's going to be hard to tell him about the hsv but what i'm even more afraid of is telling him how i got it - sexual assault. so, i'm wondering do i need to tell him how i contracted it? or if he asks can i just say someone i slept with in the past gave it to me unknowingly? i want to be completely honest with him but am just not comfortable talking about what happened to me. i figure as long as i tell him about the hsv before we become sexually involved, that is what's most important because it can affect him.

please let me know if anyone has any thoughts on this!

If you aren't ready to talk about being sexually assaulted with your partner, don't . You can just say - I have genital herpes ( insert which type here ) and then ask what they know about it and if they've ever been tested themselves. Then let them know how you can together reduce their risk of contracting it from you if they don't have it themselves already. I typically don't recommend letting new partners know who you got herpes from or when ( other than just a general - years ago or recently or whatnot ). If a partner asks, just nicely say that that's a topic that is off limits.

good luck and let us know how it goes! remember, this isn't a confession that you have herpes, it's a discussion about std's and testing too.

betsy

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