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 Post subject: Boyfriend has herpes
PostPosted: Wed Jun 02, 2010 11:31 am 

Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2010 11:24 pm
Posts: 6
Location: Portland
Hi

i need advice

my bf just found out that he has type 2 hsv-genital herpes. I am negative for it. he has never had an outbreak

-can he go down on me and will that give me genital herpes? (my question is not around oral sore etc, it is more around someone who has genital herpes engaging in oral sex with their partner giving them the type 2 virus)

-can i get hsv 2 by kissing? by coming in contact with his skin even though there is no outbreak

how risky is it to have sex with a condom with someone who has never had an outbreak

thank you all very much, i am freaking out here


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 Post subject: Re: Boyfriend has herpes
PostPosted: Wed Jun 02, 2010 2:04 pm 

Joined: Mon Feb 05, 2007 11:47 am
Posts: 5443
Location: PA
welcome to the board :)

what testing did you have? do you by chance recall your bf's test results from his blood test?

how long have you been together?

If your bf has hsv2 genitally and performs oral sex on you, he can't transmit his hsv2 genital infection to you. there is a small risk of you contracting hsv2 orally from performing oral on him but it's really low risk. same with kissing - it's doubtful his hsv2 is oral so kissing isn't a risk.

is he going to start daily suppressive therapy?

if you two do nothing but avoid sex any time he has obvious genital symptoms, your risk is 8-10% each year of contracting hsv2 from him. If he also takes daily suppressive therapy and you use condoms, your risk is reduced to 2-3%/year of contracting hsv2 from him. It's a fairly low risk and you will always be far more likely NOT to contract his hsv2 than you will be to get it.

keep asking questions!

betsy

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 Post subject: Re: Boyfriend has herpes
PostPosted: Wed Jun 02, 2010 2:46 pm 

Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2010 11:24 pm
Posts: 6
Location: Portland
whew, thanks good to know

we have been togehter for 2 months
we both did a blood test.
i have oral hsv and so does he
he has genital herpes and i dont
he has never had an outbreak and is 47 yrs old.
i would not perform oral on him

curious-if he has never had an outbreak does he still need to do the suppressive therapy?

thank you so much


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 Post subject: Re: Boyfriend has herpes
PostPosted: Thu Jun 03, 2010 12:07 pm 

Joined: Mon Feb 05, 2007 11:47 am
Posts: 5443
Location: PA
Definitely ask him what his hsv2 igg results were to post here for me to look at. Having hsv1 increases the risk of a false positive so since he can't recall ever having had any symptoms, best for me to look to see if he needs additional testing or not.

A lack of obvious symptoms doesn't mean a lack of shedding. he's still just as contagious as someone who gets 10 ob's a year so discussing whether daily suppressive therapy is a good idea or not is good. this is a new relationship so taking full precautions is never a bad idea.

betsy

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 Post subject: Re: Boyfriend has herpes
PostPosted: Thu Jun 03, 2010 10:50 pm 

Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2010 11:24 pm
Posts: 6
Location: Portland
Thanks Betsy for your help

I will post his results but we went through planned parenthood and they didnt give us any results (hard copy) just said over the phone that yes, you were positive for hsv 2 (i came positive for oral hsv 1 but negative for hsv 2). he was positive for both. He has taken another test with stdtestexpress (labcorp) and awaiting results

ok now i am confused--what is the difference between shedding and symptoms?

how safe are the following during no symptoms or shedding. (During outbreaks i want total no contact when it happens)

-kissing (even simple skin kiss)
-skin contact
-using the same toothbrush
-using the same soap

Thank you again

(these may be naive questions but i need to keep myself safe :(..)


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 Post subject: Re: Boyfriend has herpes
PostPosted: Fri Jun 04, 2010 5:54 am 

Joined: Mon Feb 05, 2007 11:47 am
Posts: 5443
Location: PA
I recommend the herpes handbook at www.westoverheights.com it's free to read online or print out at home. give it a read and I think it will answer most of your questions.

betsy

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 Post subject: Re: Boyfriend has herpes
PostPosted: Fri Jun 04, 2010 12:23 pm 

Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2010 11:24 pm
Posts: 6
Location: Portland
Thanks

Here are his results

Herpes Simplex Virus Type I IgG Test (HerpeSelect) 6.51 0.00-0.90 Positive 06/01/2010 06/03/2010
Herpes Simplex Virus Type II IgG Test (HerpeSelect) 3.78 0.00-0.90 Positive 06/01/2010 06/03/2010


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 Post subject: Re: Boyfriend has herpes
PostPosted: Fri Jun 04, 2010 4:22 pm 

Joined: Mon Feb 05, 2007 11:47 am
Posts: 5443
Location: PA
his hsv1 is +.

His hsv2 is a low positive and needs confirmed with further testing. A herpes western blot ( wb ) or a biokit hsv2 igg blood test would both be good for confirming his status.

betsy

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 Post subject: Re: Boyfriend has herpes
PostPosted: Sat Jun 05, 2010 2:50 pm 

Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2010 11:24 pm
Posts: 6
Location: Portland
Thanks Betsy, we will go get the test

So I am curious-does that mean there is a chance that this was a false positive in any way and that he does not have herpes?


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 Post subject: Re: Boyfriend has herpes
PostPosted: Sat Jun 05, 2010 4:55 pm 

Joined: Mon Feb 05, 2007 11:47 am
Posts: 5443
Location: PA
there's a chance that it is which is why he needs the 2nd test. Well worth the hassle of getting it done to confirm it.

betsy

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 Post subject: Re: Boyfriend has herpes
PostPosted: Sat Jun 05, 2010 6:18 pm 

Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2010 11:24 pm
Posts: 6
Location: Portland
absolutely. we will get it done and update you here. thanks again for your help


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 Post subject: Re: Boyfriend has herpes
PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 11:17 am 

Joined: Thu Mar 10, 2011 5:49 pm
Posts: 6
Location: Seattle
"newbie1" Thanks Betsy, we will go get the pulse test

So I am curious-does that mean there is a chance that this was a false positive in any way and that he does not have herpes?
Newbie,

I would not think too much about the chance of there being a false positive. Based on my experience, the fact that you both have oral herpes and the numbers from the blood tests indicate that he does indeed have it. I hate playing devil's advocate, but I feel like it is important for you as a couple to remain aware of the situation even though there has never been an outbreak. Use a condom and encourage him to do the daily therapy, it is the best and most effective way to keep you from contracting the disease as well.

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Last edited by ShyTeen206 on Wed Mar 16, 2011 12:33 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: Boyfriend has herpes
PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 1:39 pm 

Joined: Mon Feb 05, 2007 11:47 am
Posts: 5443
Location: PA
shyteen - once again, I don't think you know as much about herpes as you think you do. also please limit your comments to current posts.

if you have a question about your own situation, by all means please post about it and I'll gladly give you a hand with it :)

betsy

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